Beth Romero

Author, Persuasive Storyteller, Stoic Optimist

Happiness

Amp Your Happy with Music

Another way to boost your good feels is to move. Movement is the bane of stagnation. Psych yourself up with music. It works. (Try staying mopey while listening to Pharrell Williams’s “Happy”; it takes some serious sad-face commitment!)

Create an upbeat mix for your life’s soundtrack. Easier yet, tell Alexa to play songs from the ’70s, ’80s, and ’90s or whatever musical genre that is your motivational call-to-arms. I created a playlist and titled it “Happy.” (Remember, we are verbing happy, so don’t roll your eyes at me.) I listened to it every day while writing my book and often broke into dance. Added bonus: the unabashed cringey-ness of it would annoy the crap out of my kids. It was the gift that kept on giving.

Scientific studies provide backup support for the beneficial power of music. Since 2006, two UCF professors, neuroscientist Kiminobu Sugaya and violinist Ayako Yonetani, have offered the popular class, Music and the Brain, which, as you can guess, explores the effects of music on brain function. Music has been shown to reduce stress and depression while improving mood, cognitive skills, memory, and health. According to Sugaya, music also increases dopamine release in a specific part of the brain, similar to that of illegal drugs. It’s like a cerebral Woodstock, only with musical rather than chemical stimulants (and better hygiene).

In other words, it’s time to tune into a happier you. It’s one of the easiest things you can do to give yourself an immediate pick-me-up. (Disclaimer: please do not emotionally “cut” with music, as that defeats the purpose. Point in fact—when I was going through my divorce, an acquaintance once suggested I listen to this new vocal artist, Adele. “She will sing your pain,” he advised. Well, he was right. I’m obsessed with Adele and find her talent astonishing, but repeatedly playing “Someone Like You” while sitting in the dark and drinking wine ranked up there with Top Ten Coping Mechanism Fails. So, choose wisely. (Think Lizzo, not Billie Eilish!)

Beth’s Happy Playlist

  1. Hooked On A Feeling (Blue Suede)
  2. Good as Hell (Lizzo)
  3. Spirit In The Sky (Norman Greenbaum)
  4. Escape (The Pina Colada Song) (Rupert Holmes)
  5. Come and Get Your Love (Redbone)
  6. Brandy (Looking Glass)
  7. Put Your Records On (Corinne Bailey Rae)
  8. Lovely Day (Bill Withers)
  9. Firework (Katy Perry)
  10. Stronger (Kelly Clarkson)
  11. I Can See Clearly Now (Johnny Nash)
  12. Dancing in the Moonlight (King Harvest)
  13. Everlasting Love (Love Affair)
  14. The Lion Sleeps Tonight (The Tokens)
  15. (Sittin’ On) The Dock Of The Bay (Otis Redding)
  16. Tiny Dancer (Elton John)
  17. Goodbye Yellow Brick Road (Elton John)
  18. Can You Feel the Love Tonight (Elton John)
  19. Maggie May (Rod Stewart)
  20. Carry on Wayward Son (Kansas)
  21. Night Moves (Bob Seger & The Silver Bullet Band)
  22. Imagine (John Lennon)
  23. Easy (The Commodores)
  24. Sweet Home Alabama (Lynyrd Skynyrd)
  25. Joy To The World (Three Dog Night)
  26. Fooled Around And Fell In Love (Elvin Bishop)
  27. Total Eclipse of the Heart (Bonnie Tyler)
  28. With Or Without You (U2)
  29. It Must Have Been Love (Roxette)
  30. Can’t Fight This Feeling (REO Speedwagon)
  31. Hungry Eyes (Eric Carmen)
  32. Sister Christian (Night Ranger)
  33. Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us Now (Starship)
  34. Against All Odds (Phil Collins)
  35. I Guess That’s Why They Call It The Blues (Elton John)
  36. Every Time You Go Away (Paul Young)
  37. Jack & Diane (John Mellencamp)
  38. Under the Bridge (Red Hot Chili Peppers)
  39. I Will Always Love You (Whitney Houston)
  40. What’s Up? (4 Non Blondes)
  41. I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing (Aerosmith)
  42. Nothing Compares 2 U (Sinéad O’Connor)
  43. Never Enough (Loren Allred)
  44. This Is Me (Keala Settle)
  45. Claire de lune (Best Movie Soundtracks)
  46. Purple Rain (Prince)
  47. Dancing In The Moonlight (Jubël)
  48. Days Like This (Dermot Kennedy)
  49. Can’t Help Falling In Love (Kina Grannis)
  50. Never Break (John Legend)

Don’t Regina George Me!

One fine day, I was engaged in the never-ending job of chauffeuring my daughters, and as I was carting my youngest somewhere and talking about something that I’m sure was very interesting, she interrupted me and said, “Mom, don’t be such a Gretchen Weiners.”

What?

Since I couldn’t take my eyes from the road and eviscerate her with a scathing glance, I replied, “I beg your pardon?”

“You know, Gretchen Weiners from Mean Girls. She knows everything about everyone. That’s why her hair is so big. It’s full of secrets.”

Again, what?

“She pathetically tried to make ‘that’s so fetch’ a thing . . . a new slang phrase. Stop trying to make fetch happen, Mom.”

Umm, okay. In a not-so-subtle way, my fourteen-year-old was throwing some heavy shade my way. I love and respect my daughters. Their fervent fight for inclusivity, activism, and enlightened perspective inspires and truly humbles me. They’re my raison d’être and best accountability buddies ever. But that does not preclude me from seeing them exactly as they are in those occasionally less-than-perfect moments when their impassioned beliefs strangle polite discourse—when their self-righteous smugness and OK Boomer derision for anyone over twenty rears its ugly little head. It’s totally annoying, especially since I’m the one who finances their hallowed little existences.

And furthermore, I was not about to have my fourteen-year-old Regina George me. I mean, come on. I saw Mean Girls before she was even born. Ironically though, I rather did like the idea of championing a “happiness” happening. A crusade for hope. Was that so far-fetched? (Wink, wink or eye roll, your choice.) In this very moment, I decided that chronic happiness was going to be my magnum opus. I was determined to have something good come from the shitshow of 2020. To build a thriving lemonade stand on the foundations of the life lessons it had slapped me with.

And with that, my friends, the idea for this book was officially born. Dropped by a snarky stork shapeshifting as my precocious teen. This inspired moment had the unshaven hair on my legs standing at full attention (in defense, your honor, grooming took a bit of a hit during the pandemic). I swear I could hear Beethoven’s “Ode to Joy” in the background soundtrack of my mind—the motivational montage which morphed into a super mash-up with Rocky’s theme song “Gonna Fly Now.” A John McClane meets Rocky Balboa surge of inspiration. It was fire.

You are allowed to be both a masterpiece and a work in progress, simultaneously.

– Sophia Bush

The common usage of chronic is “persistent, constantly recurring,” most often in reference to an illness or something negative. I wanted this beleaguered little word to gain secondary fame as a ceaseless marathon of ooey-gooey awesomeness. In my Shangri-La of slang, chronic happiness came to refer to the constant state of play—i.e., specific habits, strategies, and mindset that keep you rooted in happiness.

Interestingly enough, I discovered during my research that “chronic” was also slang for good marijuana. Apparently, Snoop and Dre birthed the malapropism when partaking in some extraordinary hydroponic variety. Well, I wasn’t going to let that deter me in my quest for having chronic happiness happen. At least in their lexical usage, it means really, really good weed. And Snoop is dope. And apparently, I am Gretchen.

So, let’s be hope dealers.